The art of listening..

I have been thinking about listening a lot lately... I like to think I am a good listener however I don’t think I actually am! Listening is a skill that takes energy and commitment but what we can get in return is true deep connections to those we love, a much better understanding of what’s really going on in their lives and more ability to remember what has been said whether it’s a factual or an emotional conversation. The person will feel heard, well supported and worthy through these improved connections and hopefully they will then improve their own skill of listening and listen to us when we are in need too.

When I think I am listening I am often:

• Doing other things
• Concentrating on my own thoughts
• Waiting for them to finish so I can tell my part
• Likening their experience to an experience that I have had
• Waiting to give advice to fix their worry/ issue

Does anyone recognise themselves in the above? If so...

Can we try to:

• stop what task we are doing for a moment and really give them our attention
• give people time and eye contact,
• Really hear what they want to say without interrupting (argh, this is me...!)
• Ask open ended helpful questions about what they have said
• Ask if they would like any of your advice before you go ahead an offer it
• If there isn’t time to talk to say, I don’t have time to properly listen right now and give this the time it deserves but can we     pick this up later and then honour that commitment

I am going to try to be a better listener to those I love as best as I can. What is important to me in this world are the people I love and care for and creating new connectors with people I meet along the way. Through these connections there can be so much joy, as with anything in life can we pull ourselves into awareness and perhaps not always choose to rush past every experience and on to the next... Whether it’s my children, my friends or someone passing in a shop who might want 5 mins of my time my aim is to slowdown just a little to give people the time and energy they deserve.

Hope this is a helpful reminder for us all.

Let me know your thoughts on this and I promise I will listen 😂

Z x

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